Present and past
At the risk of being completely redundant, I'm back in my office grading again. In three and a half weeks I'll be done with the summer term. It will be the end of an era, albeit a short one. Six years at one job doesn't sound like a lot, but for me it's been a lifetime. Prior to January 2000, I hadn't stayed with one job for more than a year. For that matter, I hadn't stayed in the same apartment for more than two. I've dropped some deep and strong roots here, and it's really going to be hard letting go.
All our friends are planning one heck of a send off for us. They're sponsoring a luncheon at our synagogue on our last Shabbat at home. I am so moved by this gesture of warmth and love.
When I was younger I craved adventure and change. I'd put myself into debt just to avoid staying in one place for too long. I made some steadfast friends, but the ones I have stayed in touch with I can count on one hand. We used to go out dining, drinking, and dancing together week after week. We would stay up until ridiculous hours of the night pouring out our souls to one another. It felt like we'd be irrevocably bound together for a lifetime.
I can barely remember their names now.
The types of friends I have as a wife and mother are different somehow. We don't actually do much together. We talk about our kids, we give each other support and advice, we share recipes. We share kids from time to time. In a way, I have formed much richer bonds here. I don't know if they'll last any longer than my college friendships, but I hope so. I have been blessed with the kindness and guidance of some amazing, strong, smart, warm, wonderful women here. They have taught me more about being a caring, thoughtful, and unselfish person than a shelfload of self-help manuals. For this I will be forever grateful.
This has been a time for pondering friendships. I've spent a lot of time lately reconnecting with my past. My twenty year high school reunion is coming up in a month (time to hit the gym!). I had no regrets missing the tenth, but I'm looking forward to this flashback. I'm not sure I'll recognize anyone. For that matter, I'm not sure I'll recognize my past self.
I'm also seeking to remember and revive a specific time in my life nineteen years ago when I spent a year living in Israel. I have been tracking down the alumni from my program and compiling their pictures and biographies in a website I've patched together (http://machzor79alumni.org).
Perhaps I'm finally recognizing the fleeting nature of relationships, which can seem so solid one day, but can evaporate so quickly. Friendships that shape us, strengthen us, build us are like ancient empires that get buried under the foundations of a new life. I'm donning my pith helmet and excavating the old to better understand the way to preserve the new.
All our friends are planning one heck of a send off for us. They're sponsoring a luncheon at our synagogue on our last Shabbat at home. I am so moved by this gesture of warmth and love.
When I was younger I craved adventure and change. I'd put myself into debt just to avoid staying in one place for too long. I made some steadfast friends, but the ones I have stayed in touch with I can count on one hand. We used to go out dining, drinking, and dancing together week after week. We would stay up until ridiculous hours of the night pouring out our souls to one another. It felt like we'd be irrevocably bound together for a lifetime.
I can barely remember their names now.
The types of friends I have as a wife and mother are different somehow. We don't actually do much together. We talk about our kids, we give each other support and advice, we share recipes. We share kids from time to time. In a way, I have formed much richer bonds here. I don't know if they'll last any longer than my college friendships, but I hope so. I have been blessed with the kindness and guidance of some amazing, strong, smart, warm, wonderful women here. They have taught me more about being a caring, thoughtful, and unselfish person than a shelfload of self-help manuals. For this I will be forever grateful.
This has been a time for pondering friendships. I've spent a lot of time lately reconnecting with my past. My twenty year high school reunion is coming up in a month (time to hit the gym!). I had no regrets missing the tenth, but I'm looking forward to this flashback. I'm not sure I'll recognize anyone. For that matter, I'm not sure I'll recognize my past self.
I'm also seeking to remember and revive a specific time in my life nineteen years ago when I spent a year living in Israel. I have been tracking down the alumni from my program and compiling their pictures and biographies in a website I've patched together (http://machzor79alumni.org).
Perhaps I'm finally recognizing the fleeting nature of relationships, which can seem so solid one day, but can evaporate so quickly. Friendships that shape us, strengthen us, build us are like ancient empires that get buried under the foundations of a new life. I'm donning my pith helmet and excavating the old to better understand the way to preserve the new.
posted by law school widow at 9:22 PM
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